☆ j'ai fini

I'm pleased to report that it's not a case of "je sues fini", but rather I am indeed finished with my final ever University exam period and this is definitely never going to be something that I will forget. I have never been so stressed in such a short amount of time: I have the physical scars to prove it (my mouth is full of stress-induced ulcers and the amount of empty medication packets in my bin is quite scary).
But, I made it and I am stronger and even more humbled after realising just how much I need and rely on both my earthly parents and my heavenly Father. Without them, I would not have been able to do it - I am sure of this.
Talking more casually about the exams though, I had 6 exams in a period of 12 days, which was pretty bad. Spread over 2 weeks, I had Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday of the first week, followed by Wednesday and Friday on the second week, so I was really panicking when the first week finally started. Not to go into too much detail since I'm sure nobody even knows what I'm talking about, but I don't particularly feel like I've done well this exam period. That's quite a sad thought because I worked so hard during this semester, the hardest that I have ever worked, but like my dad says: don't make everything a competition - as long as you know you've tried your hardest.

So, where do I even begin explaining all of the amazing things I have done since semester 2 of my 4th year started? I saw Taylor Swift and she was amazing (and I also saw Ellie Goulding, who was TayTay's secret guest). I partied with my lecturers at our pharmacy ball. I celebrated getting one year older and one year with my KM. I met my cousin's beautiful babies for the first time. I had my last ever lecture in the lecture hall where it all began.

It's so strange to see those weeks condensed into so few photos. At the time, it seemed like it would both never end and that it was going too quickly, and honestly, I'm still not quite sure it's fully sinked in that I don't ever have another lecture to go too. No more 9am - 6pm days filled with going back and forth between lecture halls on campus. No need to ever wear my lab coat again. I will never walk 'the inside way' to 5W because it's raining torrential buckets outside. I won't have another tutorial meeting. I feel a bit emotional typing all of that out, if I'm quite honest. I've just had the best time here. If I could freeze time right now, in this one moment, I would.

Anyway, now that exams are over, I have a lot of spare time on my hands, obviously. I think back to this time last year, after my third year summer exams were over. Today is my second day off since exams finished and my flatmates are not home: one of them is spending the day with her family. Another is studying for a resit she has, whilst the other is out with her non-pharmacy friends. So, here I am, writing a blog entry and to be honest, I'm quite comfortable just being here today on my own. I have my radio on, iced lemon tea in a glass on my table and I'm happy to be able to write to my heart's content. The only thing I could wish for that would make me even happier would be to have my boyfriend beside me.
I can't quite believe that we've made it this far together: we've just had our 14 month anniversary last week, which doesn't sound like much really, but it's been so hard adjusting this year. We've had our ups and downs, and this exam period has been hard on him too, but I'm looking forward to seeing him next week. I miss my favourite boy so so much.

This week, I have a number of plans: I need to go rollerblading, I'm going to the spa with my girlies for the last time (it's a yearly end-of-summer-exams tradition), I will definitely go shopping, I will watch a million films (including Frozen finally) and I will just alternate between pyjama days and dressing up in my LBD and heels. The week afterwards, I'll be flying off to Hong Kong with my Uni friends, and I'm so looking forward to introducing my closest and dearest friends to my culture. I'm also excited to be able to go home next week. It's only for 1 day, but it's enough: I need to see my parents and tell them how much they mean to me. Even though they were abroad during my exam period and even though they were 8 hours ahead, they still somehow were always there for me. I can't begin to explain how much I love them and I can't wait to get home and just give them both such a huge hug and kiss.

I'm sitting here today, in my bed. The sun is shining and my window is open. My radio is playing "Red Lights" by Tiesto and I have finished my glass of lemon iced tea. I don't quite know what I'll be doing tonight or what I'll be doing tomorrow. I will most probably phone my grandma tonight and my family too. I have a FaceTime date with my boyfriend and I'm sure I will probably nap later on. 

If I could freeze time right now, I would do it: right here, right now. But I can't: all I can do is make sure I take these moments and make them into memories. Summer 2014, I'm ready for you.


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